Tag Archives: happiness

HAPPY. CONTENT. POSITIVE. SHOULD BE STRESSED?

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Grey’s Bay, Bowen

Lately things have been kinda stressful, especially if I take a step back, looking from the outward in, but from my point of view, (especially or mainly due to the daily yoga practice I’ve been doing since January 1st) I don’t feel stressed, although I know there are some pressing matters that I should probably feel pretty darn stressed about.

Do you ever feel like you should feel stressed, like almost society says you should be stressed out by something and so you kind of play it out?

I haven’t done that so far, apart from acknowledging that I am in a potentially stressful place if I choose to accept it. I’m going to be brutally honest here.

16559132_10155123903552868_13656560_nI have less money in the bank than I am comfortable with, although I have no debts, no credit cards, no mortgage to pay off, so in many ways I am in fact free-er than the average home owner. (except I don’t have the joy of owning a home!)

Last year I earned more money than I think I have any other year of my life, I felt rich! I had a steady income, worked my butt off and was very happy. I’m glad for that as it helped me to make so many precious memories and journeys. I have lived work-free on and off for many months, living a life of luxury!  (Mainly because of lack of work not from choice!)

However, I have a visa to renew before November costing nearly $7000 aud.

It is looming over me.

I am working to a bit of a deadline, but there is a need that I must fulfil, I have to make it happen as no one else can. So, here goes, I’m gonna do my darnedest to create the life we want.

The biggest problem I’ve faced so far is that being on a working holiday visa, commonly known as a backpacker visa, means that any full time work I apply for is instantly rejected and so I am constantly applying for jobs, and if I get far enough then going to interviews and finally  being rejected when they find out my visa situation. It gets slightly disheartening, but I won’t stop trying!

It’s a catch 22 situation, no work because of my visa and no new visa applied for yet, because I don’t have the money to apply for it.

Anyway, my point is that I am trying out this new thing, called “Not freaking out about things.” I am just trying my best, staying positive, and taking whatever casual work I can to keep us afloat, which will hopefully lead to something more permanent. I have found that keeping tabs on my positivity levels and staying happy and thankful for what I have, makes me way more productive and likely to be able to get through any challenging times.

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Murray’s Bay, Bowen

After my visa comes through (Please accept me Australia!), we have big plans for the longterm. Buy a property to renovate eventually, (possibly where we are living now, in Bowen, possibly not) have our own boat and live in North Queensland with some beautiful dogs in a GORGEOUS place near to the beach that we’ve made our own. Our door always open to parents, siblings, friends and naughty nieces & nephews to visit.

Oohhh I can just see it all!

Side Note: (Say HELLO to ZEUS, the little puppy we are adopting, who will be ours on Saturday!)

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Our new family member, Zeus

So that’s the dream! We’ve found our little piece of heaven in each other and now it’s time to make it our home!

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Dingo Beach

Definitely a time to remember that making your dreams a reality isn’t always easy, but it’s worth a try.

You just gotta take it one step at a time.

My top five stress relieving tips:

  1. Daily exercise routine. No matter how much time you have to spare, take a little time out of your day even if it’s just 10 minutes to do a short relaxation yoga or meditation video on Youtube, or going for a short walk. You’ll often want to do more than you’ve planned on once there, and if not that’s okay. This will also help you sleep better as it really clears your mind and is a natural stress reliever. I highly recommend Yoga With Adriene’s videos.
  2. Following on from the last point, Sleep! I can be a terrible sleeper especially when I know I have something important to do the next day. It always seems to be once my head hits the pillow all of my worries crawl out of the shadows. I try to encourage a good nights sleep for myself by being productive during the day, keeping a notebook and pen beside my bed to jot down anything I remember I need to do and preparing what I’ll need for the next day – even just laying out my outfit and shoes, or re-organising my handbag helps me. A cup of tea also helps me to unwind and chill out. If I wake up in the night or can’t sleep, I go to the toilet, drink some water, write down whatever is bothering me and try again.
  3. Talk to someone. I find just voicing my fears or troubles to someone close to me can help to understand things from another perspective and it also helps to feel supported, receive suggestions and to help come up with solutions. It really helps to feel less alone. Everyone gets stressed out and if you meet up with a friend to do something fun such as go out for a walk or lunch for a chat, or have someone over for movies or drinks, then you can feel some clarity whilst having fun, which can help to eradicate negative emotions surrounding you. You may also realise that your positive friend has some stressful situations going on in their life and that can put your issues into perspective
  4. Tidy up your life. If you’re already stressed, it certainly doesn’t help to be surrounded by chaos, and I find that organising my clothes or even just hoovering and cleaning a little helps to make me feel less stressed out. You know where everything is and it feels calming to be in a nice environment and while that certainly doesn’t fix the reason you are stressing out, it definitely helps you to focus on what is important. Writing lists, making a bullet journal, buying a fancy new notebook to make plans in or even just pampering yourself a little can definitely help. I bought a new Doona cover the other day from Woolies on sale for $10, it has brightened up our bedroom and I definitely have been feeling happier and more relaxed from such a simple difference.
  5. Change it up. As Einstein said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results” I’m a big believer in moving out of your comfort zone, even if you don’t like it, at least you tried. If you are scared of flying then maybe book a fun trip with friends, if you  hate your job or where you live then why not go volunteer or teach abroad for a few months, if you are sad about being unfit why not join the gym or make up your own fitness regime. Sadly it can be easier to come up with excuses. Something that sometimes helps me, as strange as it sounds to say it, I think of life like a challenge. I don’t want the game to be over and for me to still be on level one. I want to have felt emotions, been places, met people, been scared, got stronger, pushed myself. There is a danger of living a slightly boring existence full of regrets if you don’t push out of your comfort zone. And remember that it is NEVER too late to start. Sometimes when life is frustrating and you feel you are getting nowhere, you have to light it up yourself. You’ll be waiting a long time if you expect anybody else to make a change happen aside from you.

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Thank you so much for reading, I hope it helps if you are feeling a little stressed out at the moment.

Lots of love,

Hippy Hoo Ha x

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When did it become okay to tell someone you don’t like how they look?

NEVER.

It never became okay!

I’ve noticed a recent increase in people commenting on how I look and giving me their quite frankly unwanted opinions on my personal decisions.

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So let me clear this up: this is for all the unwanted hair-touchers, prodders and outspoken opinion makers who I’m sure we have all encountered, and maybe if you realise you have done this you can see how rude and inappropriate you have been.

Respect is the biggest lesson to be learnt here.

Here’s 5 things all arseholes don’t realise:

  • Touching a strangers hair is inappropriate & unwelcome attention.

I cannot really find anyway to make touching a strangers hair an appropriate way to greet someone, so first of all please don’t  do it on a whim because you don’t understand it, and second of all please just don’t ask to do it. Go home and Google it or something. Most people are happy to answer any questions you have, but please don’t interrupt my private conversations. The amount of times I’ve been interrupted by a random hair toucher is unreal! I would NEVER interrupt someone to ask a dumb question so STOP IT NOW!

  • Just because I look different doesn’t  mean I want to talk to you about it

You cannot comprehend how many times I have been asked ‘What do your tattoos mean?’

I don’t ask what your hairdo means or your clothes, really please just leave me alone.

To me it’s mainly decoration, and any that I have that do mean something, what do I owe to you to tell you?

It’s not a strangers business so back the fuck up.

  • People with tattoos think its a way to relate to me:

Okay, so you have tattoos, I have tattoos, that’s great, I still don’t want to talk about mine, so please stand here and tell me for hours about how and when and where you got yours and I can try slowly slither away out of earshot. Holy Christ. I don’t wanna talk about it.

(This one is probably the bane of my life.)

  • You don’t like my hair/tattoos/piercings/image/style and feel an unbearable need to let me know:

I don’t judge you or comment on your life, so please keep your thoughts to yourself. I have a partner and I am very happy and content. I don’t need your approval and I am very aware of my life choices. It doesn’t bother me if you don’t like something about me, but I would certainly never feel the need to tell anyone friend or stranger something about their image that I personally didn’t like. Keep it to yourself! How rude of you! Live and let live!

  • You need to let me know that I’m probably going to regret that:

Oh yeah, so I never realised until you mentioned that it’s permanent.

Yeah I’ll totes regret it.

I hate your face!

(jokes)

So, what I’m trying to say is that I don’t understand why people think its okay to comment, is it because they think I want the attention? I genuinely think that some people assume that if you have tattoos and piercings and ‘mad’ hair you are doing it for attention, well you are very wrong.

I along with most other people who are seen as alternative are just being who we are.

I understand why people ask about these things but most of the time I get asked in a very rude manner. I worded this post in a jokey manner to try keep it fun. I am never rude to people who do ask me about things, but I would live a simpler life without this hassle as I’m sure a lot of people would too.

I choose to live my life this way and I like to decorate my body, I would never dream of asking someone why they don’t have body modifications so please give us a break and realise that we don’t all live our lives  in the same way!

* as a back note I’d like to say that I understand genuine human curiosity and that I can respect that and I can tell the people who are genuinely curious from the invasive rude people! Most of you are just lovely, it’s just a small percentage that lets us down.

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Don’t let your emotions rule you.

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The day these photos were taken are very important.

This was my 26th birthday party in September 2012 in Barcelona, and most importantly, the morning before these photos were taken, I wanted to kill myself.

I look at these now and can see that I do not look like someone who felt that way, but I did.

At this point, I had reached rock bottom, again.

I want people who feel like ending their lives, to know that tomorrow is always better, and if you don’t believe me then hold off cos there’s next Tuesday, next month, next year or something to look forward to, and slowly but surely you can build your life back up. If that’s not enough imagine how many people will suffer because of you.

Suck it up and stay alive.

Don’t do it, because life is full of ups and downs and it is a chemical imbalance. You aren’t thinking clearly and lets suppose you have one chance at life on earth so you better try make the most of it. Who knows what you’ll miss out on.

Please don’t do it.

The ones who love you save you.

Sometimes you cant see them but they are there.

For once I don’t think I can write any more about this so I’ll leave it at that, and with the thought,

‘Our greatest glory lies not in never failing, but instead rising up everytime we fall’

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“All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

It’s that time of year when everyone has been stressed out with Christmas, even me, who has a very understanding and carefree family. Even so, I have been mega stressed out the last few months (more so than usual.)

I try to be calm, but is it true that people who are very creative and aware struggle a lot during these times?

I feel like an alien often, I cannot understand how such a consumerist lifestyle has become so accepted. I cant get my head around it. I feel crazy for just wanting to say no to it all. Is it not enough that I love and care for everyone around me? Do I have to buy people  things to let them know I love them? Actions speak louder than words for sure, and not everyone can buy fancy things for their loved ones.

In the last few years Christmas has become hard for me, I am a bit of a perfectionist and I like to make things for people but if I don’t think something is good enough I won’t give what I’ve created. I always feel like a disappointment at Christmas, because there are not enough hours in the day to create something perfect enough for everyone I love. I therefore have to rely on the fact that hopefully they know that i love them so much, no bought gift could say it and nothing I can create is perfect enough for them.

In the last few months I have realised that what happens is a panic attack. I seize up and panic, cry and cant breathe, and I haven’t understood this for years, but now I know,  this happens for me especially before or during events like Christmas where I feel like I have to be so organized and perfect.

This is the kinda time where people often reflect on their year, and on reflection this year was one of the roughest times, following on from some really rough years before that too… I am learning and growing, I’m trying so hard, I want to be healthy and well, I want to forget my demons of the past, but it’s not about that I suppose. Without all of these past experiences I wouldn’t be who I am now. I know I’m not the best person, I know I’m not the best me, and I could be better, but I also know that every experience has altered my perception and I’ve learnt.  I don’t hold grudges. If you hate me, I wish you love, If you love me or don’t know me, I wish you love, I genuinely do. I feel like the awkward person in the room. I’ve always been different and I always will be, but I guess you have to embrace it. There’s no other option really.

I don’t mean to be nasty or mean and I’d never try to hurt someone intentionally, but sometimes you get into situations where there’s confusion, and aloofness is not always the best trait to have. I’ve always wished I was more assertive, that I could let my fire out, because I feel like I have sat and taken so much shit from people in my life and been a walkover. If only I could stand up for myself, because deep down I really believed in me. But I don’t, I am so insecure and it drives me crazy. I look and act on the whole like someone who is very confident and secure and the majority of the time I am not.

I also find that when I am alone, anxiety is at its worst, but once I’m around friends/family I become an entertainer of sorts, I embrace this opportunity to have fun. But you cant always be surrounded by people and you most definitely cannot rely on anyone other than yourself for happiness.

One of the most vital things I have learnt over the last few years is to be happy for others, no matter what the circumstance.

It takes nothing to give a good intention. Often those who are mean to you or aggravate you are most in need of some love. This is true and I know this first hand, because whenever I am crabbit as hell, it is when I am most in need of love from others.

Don’t hold grudges.

Don’t judge people on one encounter.

None of us are perfect, we all have our moments of weakness where the facade falls. I pride myself on being happy and fun, but I can’t always do that. I cant always be a perfect person.

No-one is perfect.

It doesn’t exist!

The most beautiful thing in life is how different everyone is, the most interesting people to me aren’t trying to be cool, they just see things a bit different to the norm.

It doesn’t matter who you are to other people, you are you, you are special and unique, and there are people who love every ounce of your being.

I promise.

I get sad.

I feel like I hate myself at times.

I get angry.

I cant get out of bed.

I feel inferior.

I don’t want to talk.

This is not the point in this post, but I do think that it is an important point to note that the internet is an amazing tool, but that people can choose what parts of their life are shown. You choose to highlight your strengths of course.

This Christmas I was overwhelmed, I felt like I was given too much, like my family expect more of me, and now I have so much to live up to.

I am a teeny little panicky anxious thing stuck inside the body of a confident 28 year old and I don’t know what to do.

I am not the man I was yesterday.

“If I have lost confidence in myself, I have the universe against me.”

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“Use, do not abuse… neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy.” -Voltaire

* I am just heading out to work & threw this together quickly in half an hour so excuse the briefness*

I’ve been meaning to write a new post for ages, but I just haven’t been able to gather my thoughts for the last month or so. I’ve had a load of topics I wanted to write about and somehow ended up doing none because I just couldn’t decide.  Life has been pretty crazy and a lot has changed. In a good way. In a really good way.

I’ve made some conscious changes to my life. If you’ve read my blog before you’ll know I’ve mentioned depression in some of my previous posts… It is something that I imagine most people are affected by at some point in their lives and for some it is something that will never go away, but you CAN find ways to cope with it. Ultimately these things make you stronger, and they contribute to life’s unsure nature.

Things are good, things are GREAT, and I can see (& others close to me have commented) that there has been an incline in my mood and general well-being from where I was at just  a month, two months, six months ago, a year ago.

One of the most powerful things that I have done recently is to stop drinking alcohol.

I think it is easy to fall into the accepted social behaviours of our peers and society and there is no doubt in my mind that excessive drinking is not only advocated, but encouraged.

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I am talking as someone who loves a party, I love to socialise, it is my favourite thing, but this always ends up in a good ol’ booze sesh. I think I realised that I was becoming comfortable with using alcohol as a crutch for coping, and scarily I began to believe that I needed to be slightly under the influence to enjoy myself and be interesting and seen as fun by others. You know, that way you think ‘Oh god, tough day, I NEED a wine.’ Thoughts and words are powerful things. You don’t need it, you want it. It’s best to keep it that way.

A year ago I couldn’t have dreamt that I would ever stop drinking, because well why would I? I wasn’t an alcoholic, I didn’t have a drink problem, I was just doing what everyone else was.

But it was negatively affecting my life.

The main things that I really despised about it was my lack of self respect for what I was doing to my body, maybe being a bit wild and then that sense of remorse in my stomach the next day even when there was nothing really out of hand that had happened the previous night. A deep sense of unnecessary guilt, it’s called  the booze blues, right?

The hangovers themselves, feeling dehydrated to the point no amount of tea could ever quench.  Feeling tired and uninspired at work, and layering makeup on my face to cover up the exhausted, dry skin crackling below.

It’s been nearly a month now, and my outlook on drinking alcohol has completely shifted.

I have still been going out as much as I used to: I am still, as much, if not more, fun to be around, my self esteem is much higher, I feel more balanced emotionally, more motivated and ambitious, I have saved loads of money (hello new tattoo), it has helped lift my depression, I have more faith in myself and I have a clearer understanding of WHO I REALLY AM.

The fog’s cleared.

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The strangest thing that I have noticed is how it seems to distress other people around me. Everyone wants you to drink, it’s thought of as really strange and I have experienced a lot of pressure from people around me who feel that I must be missing out on something. I gotta admit, I genuinely used to feel this way about people who weren’t drinking when I was too. It’s almost a bit edgy, like you are a sober spy on the occasion.

I have learnt that I am naturally very hyperactive, in fact I feel almost a bit over the top these days, and definitely not short in confidence. One thing alcohol definitely did for me was to make me doubt myself. To question who I was, what I did, whether I was really a nice person or not. I was never a nasty or sad person whilst drinking, but there was a bitter sweetness to it. I definitely made my fair share of bad decisions.

I’m not saying that I am never going to drink again, I’m sure I will, but this time out has really helped me to take a step back and re-evaluate what I want from life. My dream job is to be self employed and at the end of the day, if you are hungover and there’s no boss to tell you off for being late or tired or shit at your job then it really is down to you to provide the motivation for yourself.

In that sense, I feel like I am definitely moving in the right direction towards the life I want and deserve.

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